It’s no secret that most people would like to be in perfect shape and peak physical condition, and while the easiest way to achieve this is by (shock, horror) consuming less calories and doing more exercise, there will always be a contingent looking for a quick fix. Don’t get us wrong, if there really was a way to get rid of our beer bellies in a week we’d be first in the queue for it, but alas, there is not, regardless of what that ripped bloke on the shopping channel told you at five o clock on Saturday morning. However, this hasn’t stopped people jumping on the bandwagon of whatever fitness fad is popular at any given time. Here we run down a few of the more ridiculous diet and fitness trends of years gone by.
Yeah, that’s right, backwards running. Otherwise known as ‘retro running’, this is the practise of – you guessed it – running backwards. The idea is that when you run backwards there is less impact on your joints, thereby the risk of injury is decreased, and you’ll also apparently be using different muscles. However, these benefits come at a grave cost as you will look absolutely and completely ridiculous. Oh, and it would also be worth noting that you probably don’t have eyes in the back of your head, so practise this one at your own risk.
Remember that guy from the shopping channel we mentioned earlier? Well he was probably flogging this utterly ludicrous contraption. If we didn’t know otherwise, we’d think that shake weight was a joke, but sadly this is not the case. If you still aren’t deterred then you can pick one up for around £25, we’d just advise you to use it in the privacy of your own home to avoid any unwelcome attention.
When that Monday morning alarm bell tolls what’s the one thing you want to do more than anything else in the world? We’ll hazard a guess that it’s probably stay in bed. And what’s the exact opposite of staying in bed? That’s right, it’s sweating your face off in a huge loud room with a bunch of ‘morning people’ drinking orange juice and high-fiving each other. We’ll take a coffee and the commute to work over that any day thanks very much.
Dog Yoga…….Dog…Yoga… Yoga for dogs.
The same floaty, new-age types who decided that drinking a broth made from Echinacea, fresh snow from the Himalayas and the tail feathers of a new born baby eagle can cure your cold (or whatever) have also decided that putting an actual staple in your actual ear can supress your appetite. It works by something something something pressure points, something something natural remedy, something something blood poisoning.
The Tapeworm Diet
The less said the better. The title alone is more than enough. If you don’t believe us, Google it.
This laughable 1970’s craze worked on the principle that wearing an enormous pair of inflatable shorts would help you to sweat off excess weight, with the added bonus of a lovely massage from the air bubbles. The stark reality though, is that in fact any weight lost by sweating is water weight and will therefore be put straight back on. Still though, they look pretty smart, right?
The Baby Food Diet
Apparently eating a tiny little container of disgusting mushy baby food in place of your usual super-sized fried chicken pizza burger will help you to shed the pounds. That is actually true. Conversely, you will be eating a tiny little container of disgusting mushy baby food. We’ll leave it to you to assess your priorities.